Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she spent the whole night flailing her arms because "primates are the only species who can move their arms like that and we shouldn't waste it"
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Grandma made me promise not to drink more beer, so I'm chugging wine.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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