i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
I'm sorry for everything. i woke up with two citations stapled to my shirt.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
They were like stripper heels, except business stripper heels, the kind strippers would wear to court.
I meant to tell you earlier: bad life decision saturday has been moved wednesday this week
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
QUIT RUINING DICK PICTURE DAY
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Randomize
