Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
It's one of the many facets of my drunken alter egos. I'm like substance abuse batman.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey, hey, hey, hey. This is a hurriCAN.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
I'm literally taking a shit naked holding a bottle of wine.
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
WHY IS THERE A FUCKING DILDO IN PLACE OF MY GEAR SHIFTER IN MY CAR?
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Who told you he won a fight? He slammed his face into the ground while trying to do 11 push-ups
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