Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
Today's dinner table topic: the probablity of my dad turning gay if he ever left my mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
I got offered a handle of vodka and tomato soup to bring his dog home. He knows me all too well.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
My 7 yo sister is trying to talk my mom into buying her a strawberry margarita. Happy Cinco de Mayo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
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