I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
She gave me a blow job and her mom gave me blueberry muffin afterwards. I love them.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
My liver can't handle being unemployed!
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
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