Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
please come you make the beer taste better
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
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he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Ok. Here's the plan. Take your hand (whichever is closest), summon all your nerve, and just stick it right down his pants.
I love you.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
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You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
Edible... I FEEL CLOSER TO THE UNIVERSE AND I DEF TRAVELED IN TIME. I THINK I CAN READ MINDS NOW.
Saw my doctor at the bar. He bought me a drink. I think he was looking up my medical record on his phone because he suddenly had to go. syphilis continues to fuck with my life
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