You are still hot in my book. I wanna dry hump u like a 9th grader then hump for real when the herpes is gone.
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
She tried to leave the threesome and I heard you yell "Hey! We don't quit at halftime!"
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I felt like I needed to shower with a Mr. Clean Magic Eraser.
Randomize