Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
I thought short asians scared me, however seeing my first tall asian I'm terrified.
his profile picture is a blurry one of him holding a beer. i recognized him instantly.
my fraternity brothers just had an intervention for me. i either have a problem or am just on some next-level shit, im gonna go with door number 2
I need to start giving them away because owning 20 dildos is never going to get me a boyfriend.
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
there's a guy pushing a keg up the street in a shopping cart. you have to love graduation
I think the world is coming to an end. Earthquakes, huricanes, floods, and now you say you LOVE him. Im building a shelter and going into hiding.
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
Want to get high and go thrifting? I'm trying to succeed making my dorm look like a deranged Applebees.
The cab driver is now flexing at a red light...
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
and then I partied with my new dealers deaf pit bull. All around a good night I'd say...
how don't worse things happen to you?
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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