She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
bars should really give you discounts for bringing your own shot glass
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
She told me her last name, which as you know is my #1 turn-off.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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