so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
so if i die before i go back to school its because the thing we found in the hallway that i've been smoking out of is a crack pipe
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
they adjusted my tv to black and white ... i thought i drank myself to colorblindness
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
Randomize
