You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
there should be a relationship option on facebook "stillllll in a relationship"
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
They asked if I wanted to shotgun a beer and before i could ask who had a knife they all had bit holes into the cans. Im never leaving Germany!
I seriously might throw up right now. In class. Sunglasses on. I'm getting too old for this.
We still need to grow old, buy a house, and drink 40's while wearing old people sunglasses, staring at the young studs mowing our lawn.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Got stoned and went to Walmart. For some reason a preacher walked up and asked if I knew the lord so I just yelled "I CAN FEEL HIM IN MY VIENS" at the top of my lungs. he left after that.
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
I'm dressed as a caveman and drunk so that's not really an option
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
