Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
I should never be allowed to dance around children at weddings. I think I just insured that a 4 year old will be a future teen mom.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
Sober sex is weird like I didn't expect this when I got clean
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