So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
Pappa wants mamma naked
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
next person that tells me Facebook is a professional tool is getting kicked in the teeth.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's sobering up. It was really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I took in his dog. My exboyfriend still calls me for 2 things, blow jobs and animal rescue. I need to end this cycle
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I'm using her Instagram as a way to know where in town she is so I can avoid her lol
You know it's time to call it a night when every guy in the bar (all 3 of them) have seen you naked at one time or another.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
i just sneezed the second i jizzed and it got in my eye. words can't describe how much i hate life right now.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
Randomize
