you guys were way drunker than both of me
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
Come on down you're the next contestant on "lets go drinking!"
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
I don't know. I'm drunk and dressed as a pirate but ill do the math tomorrow morning.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Randomize
