She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
Saw on the news tonight that Hamilton county's syphilis rate is 9x the national average...use protection!
Thanks, mom.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
walked into my roommates bathroom to her throwing up a quesadilla while singing come on skinny taco
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
APPARENTLY I MISSED SOMEONE SWALLOWING A WHOLE BAG OF METH WHILE I WAS ON BREAK.
Randomize
