I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
Michael Bay diarrhea
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
she blew me in the men's room in the restaurant. it was a french bistro, so it was okay
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
It was fine until they started lighting shots of everclear on fire and making ME take them. That's when shit went down...
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Adulthood is punching a guy in the face when you find out he's trying to fuck you and he's married instead of fucking him regardless and believing anything he says
Afterwards I drank a whole bottle of cake vodka in the bathtub while he was bawling his eyes out. Hands down weirdest hookup I've ever had.
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
Randomize
