Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I just needed to know whether or not to wear panties to work tomorrow.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I had to physically pry the rocks out of your hands so you wouldn't throw them at the guy with the cowboy hat. You probably would've missed anyways.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I remember yelling at him telling him that the strippers were "nice people."
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Randomize
