i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
Just saw my neighbor passed out in his front yard, leg stretching into the road. Full beer in his hand.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I'm in the middle no shirt white shorts humping the white dustbuster next to the guy shooting off the tazer infront of the two guys humping on the bicycle
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
There will be bowls smoken and not a single fuck will be given.
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