is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
drunk me just left notes all around the apt to remind shitfaced me that i have mashed potatoes in the fridge. do not take them down if you come home before me.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I'm not wearing a bra, watching Netflix and eating gushers. I don't know a better way to spend a hangover.
Yeah I was convinced everyone knew I was high. Time was passing way too slowly for anyone NOT to notice.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
Turns out the owner of the bar that I fucked used to be on Boy Meets World, but now he's old and bald. So there's that..
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
He started talking about getting a puppy together. So of course I went down on him later
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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