For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
Apparently unused tampons can also double as things to bite down on during public sex to prevent screaming...
Since I fall down so much at parties I've started doing this new thing where when I fall I just yell FLOOR PARTY and make people bring the party to me
i ended up making out with my new neighbor in a stranger's car that we found unlocked on a driveway somewhere. apparently drunk self never say "no" to adventure.
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
you showed up at my door at 3am, handed me a bag of cold chicken nuggets and said "lead me to the non-irish Siobhans," do YOU think you were tripping?
I went by my nickname in rehab. It made it feel more like summer camp.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
Randomize
