i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Naked Twister starts at high noon
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
I think these people may actually be nudists. You know it's bad when I feel uncomfortable.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
It's 7am. I'm making pizza & watching the Matrix. I will not be bothered.
To answer your next question, yes, I'm drunk.
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
But like, I don't remember getting hit with the door... I just come out from peeing and there was blood running down my face.
Randomize
