its not stalking. its research.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
We started telling people we were married, and then we hooked up on a park bench
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
My mom has had 5 shots of fireball today and she's still functioning normally... She's just extra polite.
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
Randomize
