Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
just skyped with my friend to listen in on the people talking shit about me in the library. creepy or strategic?
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
You know, you could always move. Lol somewhere without gators, water moccasins, and Marco Rubio.
Randomize
