Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
the number of months ive had a girlfriend in my life divided by the number of blowjobs ive gotten is extremely depressing...
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
apparently i found nail polish and started playing a game i made up called "paint a nail, do a shot"
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
You know its going to be a good day when you have to brush your teeth out of a cup in your room using the vodka and water mixture in your fridge because you're locked out of your restroom
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Randomize
