There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
so the weed I found in my fridge is actually lettuce. tell jim I need that 5 bucks after all
hey, we don't wanna leave the house because we're watching fireworks on tv. this is america.
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he like comes into my room and is like..."can you fix my pants" and then just drops trou
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
My boyfriend just sent me flowers. I am now crying at the fact i fucked my fat neighbor. God please help me.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my roommate just showed me the scar on her forehead... that she got from a shake weight... That. just. happened.
just sex-dialed 911. that's 34 seconds of dignity i will never get back.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize