if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Some rando is vomiting profusely into the garden outside the employee entrance. Where are you when things like this happen to me?
Vomiting outside the employee entrance
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
He texted back and said he would hook up if he didn't have a test at 8am. It's really hard to be annoyed by how good of a student he is.
Yeah that sucks. That's why I stick to deadbeat sports management majors.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
So many questions...the two most important are, where the fuck is my booze and how did you even get the couch through the door?
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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