i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
All I remember was you telling him there was something behind him so he would turn around and you could slide down his carpeted stairs on your belly without a shirt on. How's that carpet burn btw?
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
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