I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
She's grinding on a deaf black man and I'm the interpreter.
The good news is that I can 100% reassure you that you did not get knocked up by some creepy Italian dude named Sal Manella last night.
The bad news is that you will never know the name of the guy who may have gotten you pregnant last night because he clearly gave you a fake name, sweetie.
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
I met her parents last night. Her dad smelled like weed and kept yelling "I HAVE ALLERGIES AHHH MY EYES ARE BURNING!" During dinner It had to be good weed he didn't even know he was yelling.
Just found out that my name comes from part of my mom's old stripper name.
Just laying in bed, snuggling my cat, and pondering whether I'd like to attend a swingers party this evening...
You were trust falling into bushes
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
Ex-boyfriend shit on a ping pong table at a party last night. Taking "party pooper" to a whole new level.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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