it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
You drew a self portrait of yourself on his wall with sharpie.
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
How could you not respond to a text containing the words "goat man" ?!?
I'm with the hottest fuckin fire fighter right now. I'm ready to fake my own death.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
fucking him is like fucking old faithful. you could set your watch by his orgasms.
Randomize
