we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
I am moving slowly w him. I havent even masturbated to him yet.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
She asked if I could convince him so shave that shit off his face so he'll have a snowball's chance in hell of getting laid.
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
ready for a night of bad decisions, horrible moral standards, and an unhealthy amount of illegal substances.
Randomize
