Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
So I just googled the ten commandments... Were fucked.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
Somehow after we left in 3 different cars to all go to different places we still all ended up in the emergency room
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
I walked in her room to find her rubbing lotion on her face high as fuck.
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
She's passed out laying in the middle of the street. Cars are honking at her and going around her body. We need to stop playing BONECRUSHER.
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
