My wife all of the sudden got markedly better at giving blow jobs. Should I be happy or concerned?
We are so in love
so when's the next time you get to see your balls
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
Oh shit I just realized the ropes are still tied to the bedposts
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I was cracked out naked on a toilet pretending I was posing for playboy.. Shit got weird, but apparently I had a good bday.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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