I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
While looking for an apartment, I've realized that the way I rate balconies is on the "how easy would it be to smoke weed here" scale.
What other scale is there?
It's a given that you're going to get peed on at a country concert
Should have know they were on something when he started filling a Togo container with fruit
You got me so high that I almost couldn't leave my house for a bar because there was nothing to lean against on the way there
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I just texted my mom from a strip club.
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