Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
I made him leave at 3am, he texted me a couple minutes later and said the elevator was broken and he was sleeping in there, but he said I was worth it so I don't feel guilty
I walked in and all four of you were covering your heads under the blanket singing waterslides in unison.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
She said if her future children dont have blue eyes she wont love them
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Randomize
