YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
He just came into the room wearing nothing but a Speed Racer helmet. I think he just invented a fetish.
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
its not even a love triangle. its a love square and it has come back to haunt me
Just looked at my bank statement. 9 out of 10 transactions on the first page were from 9 different bars. The 10th was for birth control pills at the pharmacy. I need to rethink my lifestyle.
So she was amazing, that's what. Idk if it was the blow or the blowjob, but both my heads are still tingling.
Randomize
