I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just turned your apartment into a democracy and were voting on who takes shots next
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
I don't drink nearly as much when I'm coupled, and that's not a lifestyle I can commit to
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I just spent 45 minutes and a really well-put together Power Point trying to convince her to use my dog as baby Jesus in her church's play.
Randomize