lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Maybe it was silver. I don't know. I was drunk sifting through my dogs vomit.
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
If i want her back i know all i have to do is sleep with a specific handful of her closest friends. That method is tried and true.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
but they dont look like handprints. looks like someone had a boxing match with my tits and my tits lost
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
You’re going to be a doctor, and I’m going to be a trophy wife. We both have goals
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