He jizzed my face. I had to ask for a washcloth. He ran his underwear under the water and handed them to me. Not so romantic.
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
He told me I couldn't drink an unopened bottle of water he had in his room because that was his emergency bong water
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
Ok that kid was ether gay or 12 with a beard.
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
Quick question. How did my clothes end up in your room on your bed and I end up outside your room naked on your couch?
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
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