plz talk dirty to me
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I feel like a great embryo-shaped weight has been lifted off my shoulders.
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
I guess my vagina missed him because it called and left a 5 min. message. Color me impressed
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
WHEN THE HELL DOES ANYTHING IN OUR LIVES *EVER* GO AS PLANNED???
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
Randomize
