I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
apparently i'm not the first person wake up and realize she's ugly cuz i tore this house apart and there is no sign of my clothes
giving a blow job on a jetski isn't as easy as it sounds.
I wish they had nachos that got you drunk
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
Status Uddate: I lost half a tooth and Alison is taking Amy Grant requests via bullhorn
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
its 4am. iam sitting in the luggage car of the train eating beef jerkey. i feel like a hobo.
dont insult. no hobo is as pathetic as you.
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