I'm at the bar with Ashley what should I do?
humiliate her
Mom found my vibrator. all the said was 'wow, I've never seen one like this before.'
we don't live in the stone age anymore, mom
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I woke up to the bathroom door of steak n shake hitting me in the face at 4 in the morning...
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
Randomize
