Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just made a moltov cocktail out of lubricant and a christmas bulb. The fire is still going strong. MERRY CHRISTMAS
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I met her at the liquor store. I hope I'm wearing a condom
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
NO I WILL NOT SET YOU UP WITH MY TWIN WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH YOU?!? JUST BECAUSE I WONT BLOW YOU DOESNT MEAN YOU CAN STALK HER AS A BACKUP PLAN YOU SPANISH BASTARD
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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