It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
Did you know that if you chase vodka with cheap red wine it tastes exactly like college alcoholism?
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
I’m a go ahead and fuck down ATL. So when I leave in January I’ll have no regrets.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
