I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
i'm just really offended he didn't want to have breakup sex. like that was the only thing i was really looking forward to
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
If you think I'm not petty enough to drive to your house at 3 in the goddamn morning just to punch you, you underestimate me.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
He doesn't understand the concept of a strip club. He keeps falling in love
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