Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
He just spent five minutes trying to sling shot a cheese-it off his dick and into my mouth.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.