CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
He was eating her out on the elevator. What a good man.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I take that as "no I'm not driving you to the bar in a blizzard"
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
i'm only riding in the trunk because they put the case of beer back here..
You take your time. Wallowing in last nights filth is the best way to get over a hangover
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
I blew past the Governor's motorcade going twice the speed limit and DIDN'T get a ticket. God wants me to get laid.
I think my brain has decided it's boycotting life until it can do whatever it wants.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
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