I just hope my dad was drunk enough to not remember the whole convo we had about anal.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
I believe nudity is frowned upon at that establishment
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Randomize
