i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
It just so happens all of their names are Ryan, so I never have to change whose name I moan.
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
