I've done 29 out of the 30 things to do to a naked man according to Cosmo. I don't know if that makes me innovative or slutty.
Genius.
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
I need a booty call who doesn't know my boyfriend or my friends.
I need a good reason NOT to eat this entire jar of nutella right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
Your lack of enthusiasm for my exciting news of drunken debauchery with an otherwise occupied vagina of one of my greatest conquests yet disturbs me. I'm not happy with you
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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