A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
every time i recognize a doctor or patient at the hospital on this rotation, i just pray it's not from my blackout saturday makeout slut moments...professionalism shouldn't count on weekends
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
His best friend's cat died so we had a drunken burial ceremony on the side of his condo at 2am and I'm pretty sure if anyone gets ahold of the video feed from Martini Monday we're all fired.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Well, while we went through airport security, I found out Mom got her clit pierced, so there's that.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
And a hot pocket after we fucked. Heaven.
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
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